Let me be clear, this is not a complaint - the iPhone is the single most beautiful object I have ever had the pleasure to feel the sleek, streamlined weight of against my leg. Yes, I find it a bit erotic.

So maybe it's no coincidence that when I sign a text message "xx" (as I am prone to doing to indicate anything from extreme fondness to lust to indifference), the predictive text messaging predicter automatically changes it to read "fx".

A number of people have already leapt to the wrong conclusion.