It's what you deserve if you grow your hair so you can only see out of one eye #2

"I'll let others off first... because I'm balding and insecure."

"And I won't push to get on... because as the hearts in my hair indicate, I can't cope with being a grown-up. Also I can't really see properly because of the fringe."

Perhaps

Perhaps she's given up pushing people to reduce her habitual embarrassing tenancy to miss the person she wants to push due to her lack of vision with only one eye.
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OliviaB.

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