More BBC online madness

Today I made the mistake of clicking on the “Have Your Say” bit of BBC online news, and with an impartiality almost equivalent to that shown by the BBC I am forced to admit to our readers that the ridiculousness of BBC online pales in comparison to the ridiculousness of the people who read it.

The comments about the sacking of Professor Nutt are enough to make one take LSD or have a horse riding accident. I’ll skip over the GP (sorry, “gp”) who doesn’t use capital letters or full stops, and only briefly stop to take in Pat Hyde’s profound “Why have advisers if your attitude is.” Let’s get to the magnificent “jjs” from dundee:

I agree with the experts that cannabis is not as harmful as alcohol and cigarettes.

But how do we define harm? It’s a little more complicated ….

Consider two examples

Little boy – “daddy can you play chess with me tonight?”
Daddy – “wooo hooo heey man woo hoo hoo”

“Mummy can you help me with my maths homework?”
“woo hooo swish hee hoo fi fum diddly doo heey bwrrr goo man cool woo hoo”

Looks like the government knows best.

I have been considering both examples for a while now (well, for longer than I feel they really warrant) and I’m still not entirely sure what I’m supposed to glean from them, but I have a few suggestions (if jjs is reading, perhaps he/she/they could let me know which is the right one):

1. Daddy likes playing chess a lot.

2. Mummy is doing the vacuum cleaning; Mummy enjoys doing the vacuum cleaning (swish hee hoo).

3. Parents who take drugs are a lot more fun than mine were.

4. jjs was taking cannabis, or drunk, or on a horse, when he wrote this.

Professor Nutt must be quaking in his boots to have such detractors.

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